Last week families were encouraged to take time out to have dinner together.  We were encouraged to turn off the TV.  Put down the Smart phones. And pull the plugs on our MP3 players.  The purpose:  to reconnect with each other.  The long-term benefits:  lower incidence of drug and alcohol abuse among tweens and teens, decreased likelihood of pre-marital sex and increased feelings of trust and respect for each other.

This week, a research study from BOHAN reported that for the first time ever, a generation of moms is the first to spend less than half their time in eye-to-eye communication with family.  Gen Y moms report they only spend 48% of their time communicating in person with family members who live under the same roof.  Nearly 1/4 of the time they are on the phone.  14% of the time they are texting. Facebook accounts for 10% of their communication.  And 7% email members of their household.

Think about that a minute.  Gen Y moms are young.  And so are their children--too young to be on Facebook or have an email account.  Some would argue they are too young to have a cell phone.  I would like to think that the 48% of eye-to-eye communication is with their children; while the remaining 52% of I-to-I (I = Internet based communications) is with their spouses.  But the survey doesn't say so.

But before we are too quick to pass judgement, think about your own behavior.  How much time did you spend this weekend in eye-to-eye communication with members of your immediate family?  I am a Gen Xer who reportedly spends more time in person (58%) and less on the phone and other methods of communicating.  But this weekend, that wasn't the case.  My daughter was out of town at a birthday sleepover trip.  We communicated via text the whole time she was away.  Neither of us thought to pick up the phone and actually chat.  Conversely, I spent a great deal of my time talking with my husband...over breakfast, outside in the beautiful fall air, along the beach while walking our dog.  Normally, we communicate via text and email during the work day and that's just fine.  Heck, we've been known to text each other when one is on the first floor and the other is on the second.

Truth is, times have changed.  And so have our methods of communication.  We have more options available to us.  And we are using them.  I actually feel more connected to my daughter than I did with my own parents thanks to technology.  And when we are eye-to-eye, we really try and make the most of it.

All that said, I don't think technology can ever replace the value and connection that can only be made when you are present with someone--fully present with them in the same place--sharing a conversation, reading body language, and responding to what you are hearing and seeing as only eye-to-eye communication allows.

This week, make an effort get replace one I-to-I exchange with an Eye-to-Eye one and see what a difference it makes.